Just finished up with our four month shots, and Hallen was a trooper. She’s still sleeping them off three hours later. I think I’ll just let her sleep as long as possible, because our two month shots were no walk in the park. And yes, I said “our.” I never truly knew the meaning of “it hurts me more than you,” until those two month shots. She cried, I cried. She screamed, I held my scream in so I wouldn’t frighten her. She needed to be cuddled all day long, so that’s what we did. I’m hoping this time around she won’t hurt quite so much. {ie: I hope she’s not in so much pain, so I don’t bawl all day long.} I’ve got the Tylenol ready for her, though…and the vino for moi!
I feel like these four months have flown by! Every day there is something new I watch her do, and we celebrate it all. There are definitely more good days than bad (I actually think her two month shots were the only bad day we’ve had), but I know those tough days are going to come. Having your heart outside of your body is some emotionally tough stuff, though! Just imagining heart break she’ll go through one day or perhaps a broken arm just makes me want to take the blow for her to keep her in an innocent bubble. In my logical mind I know she needs to endure these tough things, though, so she can have her own faith and her own story. She needs to understand what true compassion is, what true love and hurt is, and most importantly what it mean to have a relationship with our Father. This is truly intimidating as a parent! One day, I need to sit down and just write thank you cards to all the moms and grandmothers and fathers and grandfathers who have raised children. Love has never been more apparent (hmm…parent is even in the word apparent…interesting).
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| I’m now 11.5 lbs and 23.5 inches long! A tiny and happy little peanut! |
Hallen has truly always been a pretty chill baby. Since she came out of the womb she’s wanted to sleep and stare at someone more than anything else. She’s content. She’s a lover of the present moment (something I’m learning from her how to do myself). Since about eight weeks she was sleeping through the night, and now at four months she sleeps 12-13 hours at night. The worst thing this beautiful babe does is drool buckets…and I mean buckets! I’ve joked about strapping one to her chin so we don’t have to use ugly bibs or change her outfit when her whole shirt looks like she fell in the tub! We have created a little jingle using her name and whenever we sing it her eyes light up. She knows it’s playtime or lovey time.
I know it’ll only last so long, but it really is an amazing feeling to be the coolest person in her life right now. I mean…I figure this is the top of the “cool chain” for me, right? I was never cool in middle school or high school. But now that I have a baby, everything I do, makes her laugh and wiggle with glee! Pretty soon it’ll be embarrassing and I’ll be back at the bottom of the “cool chain”, but seeing her tiny body squirm in excitement to see me or hear my voice brings tears of joy to my eyes (and I secretly give myself a high five for being the cool mom).
At four months, she also loves to interact with other people. She’s never had a problem with anyone in the past, but now she can “chit chat” with them and giggle at them. She takes in all the different features of everyone who holds her. She especially loves watching your eyes and lips. As a mom, I adore watching her watch you. So, if you’re holding her and see me staring at you, I’m not being creepy. I promise! I hope she stays open to being held and loved on by others.
Happy four months to this little peanut of a miracle. I guess you could even say that she’s our
“mustard seed of faith” the Lord gave us to not give up hope; to keep the faith. She’s a constant reminder of His everlasting, never failing, forever merciful, perfect love. My prayer is that this little girl has that type of faith one day.
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| “You don’t have enough faith,” Jesus told them. “I tell you the truth, if you had faith even as small as a mustard seed, you could say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it would move. Nothing would be impossible.” Matthew 17:20 |
Kristina
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